No Troubles To Speak Of

I'm waiting what's in store for me tomorrow.

My contract with the organisation is renewable annually and I'm just curious how the past months would be reflected. Yes -- it's been that long. Come 18th April would mark my 1st year working in this organisation. Though I'm aware of my performance appraisal, nothing beats having that piece of contract signed and confirmed. Otherwise I'm just a clause in the contract.

I've been having doubts lately, on just about everything except God. Yeah -- if you ask me I just love doing that, second-guessing my own ability and not forgiving myself when things don't go too well or smooth. It can be stiffling if one has no troubles to speak of. You need them to constantly push you.

On a side note -- it's going to be a scrambling weekend as I need to settle some tasks I couldn't complete all week! I know this is terribly inefficient of me but sometimes idling makes me more human. Heh... I'm flawed and I've transcended into my own glorious rut and shortcomings!

"And it makes me feel so fine

I can’t control my brain"

-- Weezer

Well whadaya know? GE's coming and with it the Progress Package. This is almost as good as putting people on a dole. Because even the unemployed get a share of the surplus, cool! Lol.

What Caught my Eye

When buying new CDs I can make the best and the worst of purchases. And since musical taste is entirely subjective, I can only hope the bad choice I made will grow on me as I continue to listen. I recently bought 2 CDs. Comfort Music 1 - a compilation of Artistes from label Real Music, the other Walk in the Sun by Jeanette Alexander.

Comfort Music 1 is a beautiful compilation of soothing music from Real Music. Guitars are featured prominently on most of the tracks, but there are also flutes, keyboards, voices, and other instruments. Warm and optimistic, the CD is gently uplifting and provides a nice massage for the mind.

Alas -- this is a classic example where I chose a CD because the cover CD intrigues me. It's a painting of a woman in deep cacoon-like sleep. Next to her sprouts some off-white flowers and in the horizon above her is a ship with full mast sails, but is in perfect stillness! The whole imagery is evocative of that dreamy, new world state with some hint of savagery that I can't quite pin down. And I just love the way the illustrator combines these elements together and allows you to reach to your own ideas. But I guess the music in this CD speaks for itself!

If you want to hear samples of the stuff - Here it is.

You Gotta Give It To Him

Boo hoo... I guess nowadays even mass murderers have their ardent followers. What a twisted world!

An Umrah Send off

I did not plan sending off my sister and her family at the airport today. But when she called me up to chat, you know that obligatory goodbyes and please pray for our safety and all that -- I started to have this lump in my throat. And when she's done talking with me, she passed the phone to her kids; my nephew and niece. I love them more than anything in this world.

Five minutes after the conversation ended I felt I wasn't in the mood to continue working. The sense of parting was overwhelming and I had to seek my boss' permission to leave early. I called my brother to tell the whole lot of them not to leave the departure area just yet. 'Wait for me, please...' I said over the phone, 'I'm already in the taxi leaving Braddell.'

In any moment in which I'm experiencing thoughts that make me feel sick or bad, I do my best to change them. But it irked me why I didn't plan it in advance. For that I'm thankful for having a good and understanding boss. And I'm thankful too, for that taxi driver who sensed my anxiety to get to Terminal One quickly and, safely. I never reserve thanks to taxi drivers eversince I left my phone in the taxi, but this one had the uncanny ability to read my restless mind!

Got me thinking, everyone who's ever played any role in my life, as having been sent to me for my benefit. They're put there by Him for a purpose.